I Am the ‘Boys Have a Penis’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: An Interview.
The action icon is best known as an iconic tough guy. But, in the midst of his cinematic dominance in the 1980s and 1990s, he also starred in several genuinely hilarious comedies. A prime example is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35th anniversary this December.
The Story and The Famous Scene
In the classic film, Schwarzenegger plays a tough police officer who goes undercover as a schoolteacher to catch a killer. During the movie, the investigation plot functions as a basic structure for the star to film humorous interactions with kids. Arguably the most famous belongs to a child named Joseph, who unprompted stands up and declares the actor, “Males have a penis, and girls get a vagina.” The Terminator responds dryly, “Thank you for that information.”
That iconic child was played by youth performer Miko Hughes. In addition to this part included a notable part on Full House as the schoolyard menace to the child stars and the pivotal role of the youngster who comes back in the film version of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with several projects on the horizon. He also engages with fans at fan conventions. Recently discussed his recollections from the filming of the classic after all this time.
Behind the Scenes
Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?
Miko Hughes: I believe I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.
Wow, I can't remember being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?
Yeah, somewhat. They're brief images. They're like visual recollections.
Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?
My parents, primarily my mom would accompany me to auditions. Sometimes it was an open call. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all just have to wait, be seen, be in there less than five minutes, deliver a quick line they wanted and that was it. My parents would coach me on the dialogue and then, as soon as I could read, that was some of the first material I was reading.
Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?
He was very kind. He was fun. He was good-natured, which I suppose isn't too surprising. It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a productive set. He was great to work with.
“It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”
I understood he was a major movie star because I was told, but I had barely seen his movies. I felt the importance — it was exciting — but he didn't frighten me. He was merely entertaining and I only wanted to hang out with him when he wasn't busy. He was busy, obviously, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd flex and we'd be holding on. He was incredibly giving. He gifted all the students in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was the hottest tech. That was the coolest device, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It wore out in time. I also received a real silver whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.
Do you remember your time filming as being positive?
You know, it's funny, that movie was this cultural thing. It was such a big movie, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, looking back now, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, visiting Astoria, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was just released. That was the big craze, and I was quite skilled. I was the youngest and some of the bigger kids would bring me their Game Boys to pass certain levels on games because I knew how, and I was felt accomplished. So, it's all little kid memories.
The Line
OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember how it happened? Did you grasp the meaning?
At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word taboo meant, but I knew it was provocative and it made adults laugh. I was aware it was kind of something I wouldn't usually utter, but I was given special permission in this case because it was funny.
“My mom thought hard about it.”
How it came about, according to family lore, was they were still developing characters. A few scenes were written into the script, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it wasn't pure improvisation, but they developed it during shooting and, I suppose it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't agree right away. She said, "Give me a moment, I'll decide tomorrow" and took some time. She really wrestled with it. She said she had doubts, but she felt it could end up as one of the unforgettable moments from the movie and history proved her correct.
